4 month pictures

Landon is 4 months old today....what?!?! So sad he is growing up so fast. :-((  I just have his pictures today because he hasn't had his 4 month checkup yet. I will post his stats once we visit the doctor. Enjoy the pictures! :-)

So I wanted to do this tie picture when Landon was little and he wasn't too thrilled about it, so I tried it today. 

Yeah...he still wasn't thrilled about it. lol

My chunky, chunky boy!!

Love his smile!! :)

Touch

Today Landon and I were laying in the bed together. He had just woken up from his nap so I decided to try and snuggle with him. I was really hoping that he would go back to sleep but he didn't. It was totally worth him not going back to sleep. As we lay there he kept staring at me with his big eyes. He has recently started grabbing his toys and learning how to touch them, but we didn't have any toys in the bed. Instead it was just me and him staring at each other. As he stared at me he reached his arm out with this serious look on his face. His little brow was furrowed in concentration as he stretched it all the way out and touched my face. He touched my cheek, he touched my nose and he touch my lips. I smiled at him, he smiled back and he touched my face some more. It was such a sweet moment as he explored my features and used his new skill of reaching and touching.

Later as we were eating supper, I was holding Landon. He watched my fork go from my plate to my mouth. The whole time he was watching me eat he was either rubbing my ear, neck or hair. Even though I was having to eat while holding him, I didn't mind one bit.

Just typing out these moments make my heart swell with love. I know I have been blogging a lot lately whether it is video, pictures or words. But I don't want to forget anything. I have already forgotten so much from when Kameron was a baby and have started forgetting stuff about Landon. I barely remember the first month of his life. How is that possible? I want every sweet moment etched in my mind. I want to always remember him touching my face for the first time. I want  to always remember him watching my mouth and laughing as I sang to him tonight. I want to always remember this feeling. The feeling of my child in my arms and my heart swelling with love. I don't ever want to forget.

Landon's Macro Session

I very rarely use my macro lens for my camera, but today during Landon's nap I decided to put it to use. He was sleeping perfectly and didn't even budge while I was taking pictures. Love my sweet little guy. Enjoy the pictures!

Love his eyelashes. They are so long and curly!

For your viewing pleasure! :)

Here is a video of my little guy laughing! Just ignore the hyena at the end...that's me! lol

And here is a recent picture of Kameron and Landon. At almost 4 months old, Landon is half her size! :)

These were both taken with my cell phone thus the poor quality, but I hope you still enjoy!

Budget Control

As many of you know we are a single income household. Back in October of 2009 I went part time with my job, in October 2010 business was really bad (I worked at a real estate attorney's office) so I was let go permanently. Working part time didn't bring in a lot of money, but it was better than nothing. So for almost 2 years all the financial responsibilities have been on Freddie. Some days are okay, some days are a struggle. Several times we had to make hard decisions in order to make ends meet. Going back to work wasn't really an option for me because I don't have a college education and have only had two full time jobs. In order to go back to work full time I would have had to find daycare for Kameron. Between daycare costs ($500 per month), gas, etc. I would basically just be working to pay for Kameron's daycare and my gas to and from work. So, we stuck with me staying at home.

As time went on Freddie began to have to work more and more overtime. We didn't go out to eat that much, the only money we spent on entertainment was Dish Network and we rarely spent money on ourselves. Every thing we bought was necessary. Freddie works at Michelin Tire Plant, so he is required to swing shifts. 75% of the time I feel and am a single mom. Add in working over time and I was alone even more. Typically if he worked over time it would be night shift as that shift is usually available. I was really missing my husband.

Last week as I was paying bills online, once again wishing we had more money, I realized that my bank had this new program. This program would organize your expenses and show you how much money you are spending and where it is going. I thought....this will be pretty neat. I clicked the button, it ran numbers and up popped this nifty pie chart. I began to scan the numbers, one number really stood out to me $1011. What did I spend $1011 on? Groceries!!!! What?!?! Between Wal-Mart and Food Lion, I had spent $1011 in one month! One month!! How was that possible?!?! I sat there and thought about it. We buy groceries once a week, sometimes twice. Usually our grocery bill is between $95 and $200 a week for a family of 4, one of whom doesn't even eat food right now!!

So I talked with Freddie and we sat down and made up a plan. We would make a list, we would buy food for a whole month (excluding bread, milk, fruit and some veggies) and we would eat all the food in our cabinets/freezer before we went back to the store. So I sat down and I made out a list of what food we currently had and what food we needed to buy.

Friday we grabbed my list and off we went shopping. Our first stop was Aldi, our next stop was Caughman's Meat Market. Yesterday we got our final things we needed from Wal-Mart and Food Lion. My goal was to cut our grocery expense in half for the month. My total after visiting all 4 stores was $426!!! What we bought should hopefully last us a full month if not longer. Buying from a meat market we were able to get a ton of meat (including steaks) and save a lot of money! We got 5 lbs of ribeyes, 5 lbs of ground chuck, 5 lbs of cubed steak, 5 pounds of pork chops, 5 pounds of chicken breast, 5 pounds of chicken legs and 5 pounds of bacon for $158!!

I am so excited that I might possibly be able to help Freddie financially in a way. It hurts me to see him worry about providing for his family all the time. If I can continue to do this every month and stick to it, hopefully it will save us money and hopefully it will mean Freddie will be home more often instead of working overtime.

I am beyond excited that my freezer is full and that my cabinets are full all with just $426 worth of food! :-)

Never

For the two years that I tried to conceive a baby I tried to imagine my life with children or even just a child. I had begun to lose hope that I would ever get pregnant. After trying the all natural way for a year and half I finally went to the doctor. They put me on clomid and gave me 6 months to get pregnant before I would to see a specialist. The 5th month my miracle was conceived. Little did I know how much she would change my life.

~I never wanted a daughter until God gave me one.

~I never wanted a c-section until that was the only way to get my baby out.

~I never imagined my life would be so wrapped around my daughter.

~I never thought that I would actually become a mother, but I did.

~I never imagined sitting on the floor blow drying my daughter's hair that I would have tears in my eyes because I am actually able to do this with her.

~I never thought I would pray every night for people I don't know in real life, that they would be able to have the blessing that I have.

When I got pregnant the second time I had an odd feeling that my baby was not meant to be. I never voiced those feelings to anyone. I was too scared to voice them. What person gets pregnant and thinks that it isn't meant to last? I didn't want a miscarriage, I didn't want to be part of that statistic or circle. But I did indeed become part of the 1/4 women who miscarry and I joined a new circle of moms.

~I never thought having a miscarriage could hurt so much; physically and emotionally

~I never thought that having a miscarriage would lead me to so many wonderful people.

~I never thought I would heal from the loss of my baby, but I did.

~I never thought I would I try to get pregnant again.

But I did try to get pregnant again. I fought my fear and gave having a baby another try. And we were successful. I was scared the whole time I was pregnant. My fear never left me, but it was all completely worth having my son.

~I never thought that I could love a little boy as much as I love my daughter, but I do.

~I never thought that I would completely change my way of living just to continue to breastfeed him, but I have.

~ I never thought that I would sit with tears pouring down my face as I watched my two children interacting.

~I never thought that I would want more children, but I do. Even after everything that I have been through, my heart still desires more.

I still can't believe that the girl that thought she would never have children after being diagnosed with PCOS at 17 and endometriosis at 21 is now the 29 year old with 2 children. I am so completely blessed and I am in awe everyday that this is my life.

3 months~ Pictures

I finally got around to taking Landon's pictures to document him being 3 months old. Enjoy!

the ever present thumb in the mouth

stinker

Love this little guy to pieces!

PS. Landon rolled over for the first time on the 2nd!! :-)

PPS. He is officially no longer sleeping through the night. Knew I shouldn't have bragged about him! ;-) He slept through the night all of 6 nights and the 7th night he was up every 2 hours. 4 days later and he is back to sleeping a 6 hour stretch. I blame teeth. Maybe he will sleep through the night again sometime soon! :-)

Sibilings

Kameron is all about her brother. She loves to talk to him, make him smile and laugh and tickle him. She also loves to hold him. She will beg me....seriously beg me....to hold him. So as she was holding him today I decided to take some pictures.

*note to self....taking pictures of my two children doesn't always work out the way I plan. lol

Take 1: Kameron not looking, Landon "talking"

Take 2: Kameron sorta smiling and Landon giving the stare

Take 3: And I guess this will have to do!

PS. I actually took 20 pictures and only got 3 decent ones. :-/