There are days that I am so wrapped up in my stress of life and my stress of being a mom that I forget the days of when I longed to be pregnant, and to be a mom. The days that I wept at night because I could not get pregnant, and I would cry out to God to PLEASE bless me with a baby. “All I want is a baby!!! Why can’t you give me the one thing I want so badly?!?!?!” Now I have the one thing I wanted and I am not always thankful for her.
Why? Why would I not be thankful for the most wonderful thing in my life?!? What is wrong with me?!?!?!?
And my answer is…..
I have no freakin clue! The only answer I have is that there are days that the stress gets to me and I long for the days when I could just paint my toenails and not listen to a whining baby. These are the days when I try my best to make myself stop and remember the days when my heart was empty and all I did was long for a baby. I try to think of the many people out there that do not have the joy I have with my sweet baby. People like my friend Kelly who lost her baby at 39 weeks. She has recently started blogging about her experience. She is so brave to do this, and I am not sure if I could do the same. When I read her blog it opens my eyes more to the fact of how blessed I am to have Kameron. I need to learn to treasure EVERYTHING about her…the sweet times, the whiny times, the hilarious times and the times I want to pull my hair out! My heart is full and my arms are full, what do I have to complain about...not a DAMN thing!!!!! My life is all I ever I wanted it to be, and I couldn’t be more blessed. Thank you Lord for the true treasure I have in my daughter. Nothing can bring me joy like her sweet laugh and her beautiful smile. Nothing warms my heart like her running up to me to give me a hug. She may try me, but she is the greatest joy in my life. She completes me, and drives me to become the best person and mom I can be. She is the sweetest thing in the whole world, and I could not ask for more!
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