He's here!!!

Landon Frederick was born on Wednesday, March 28th at 9:09 am. He was 7 lbs even and 19 1/2 inches long.

After having contractions for several weeks along with pain along my scar from my previous c-section I was getting pretty exhausted. This past weekend was pretty painful as I had contractions all day and night every day and they were always followed by incision pain. At my doctor's appointment on Tuesday it showed that I was having contractions every 2-3 minutes and off I was sent to the hospital for observation and to try to stop the contractions. Despite being given 3 bags of fluid and a shot I was still contracting.  I spent Tuesday night in the hospital for further observation and the decision was made Wednesday morning to go ahead a take him. I was scared, excited and nervous. I was very nervous about the section because my previous one was so bad. Thankfully the section went way better than last time. My doctor did have to work through a lot of scar tissue and then discovered that part of my uterus was really thin. She told me that it was very good that we went ahead and did the section when we did because my uterus could have ruptured within a week.

I am so glad that things turned out okay. Despite being 3 weeks early, Landon is perfect. He scored 8/9 of the apgar, has no problems breathing and is nursing like a champ. He is so sweet and his snuggles are even sweeter.

Kameron is doing great being a big sister and seems as besotted with him as everyone else.

Kameron

It is so hard to believe that in a week and half my little girl will be 3 years old!!! Time went by so fast!

How did she go from this....

1 day old

To this......

And in such a short amount of time? Oh she is my life, my heart, my light. I love her so much!! She is who made me a mother. The best possible thing in the world. She tests me, she makes me want to pull my hair out, but she can make me laugh just as quickly and cry with how sweet she is. I love her smile, her sweet laugh, and that she still loves to snuggle. She truly is the best thing in the world!

In celebration of her upcoming birthday, we took her to the park today for a mini-photoshoot. I wanted to be able to document this time her life before her brother arrives. Here are some pictures of our special trip and my beautiful girl!

being sassy!

36 weeks, 3 days~ Maternity Pictures

I had the hubby take some pictures today of the big ole belly and then I edited them. There aren't a whole lot but I am super happy with them! I never took any "pretty" pictures when I was pregnant with Kameron so this  is something special to document what will probably be my last pregnancy. Enjoy!

36 Weeks!!

Hopefully I will get a picture taken and posted tomorrow at some point. Honestly I'm not liking taking pictures at this point because I'm not feeling my best, but I really want to document how much this belly is growing! And boy is it growing! I seriously feel like I am full term and that he is close to 7 pounds already. This thing is getting hard to tote around all day and still being able to function. I am taking a lot of breaks throughout the day to just sit and sip water because I get wore out so quickly. I have also been instructed that I am not to go anywhere by myself anymore due to more signs of labor and a possible early arrival of Landon. :-/ I am still in shock that we are so close to the end now! :-)

Now the stats:

Total weight gain/loss: 12 pounds. I was up to 14 pounds but lost 2 pounds in a week. I think I was retaining fluid and I have been battling bad nausea again; so this means not so much eating going on.

Maternity clothes? oh course!

Stretch marks? Kind of hard to avoid at this point

Sleep: still kinda blah. I am exhausted so I go to sleep, but I wake up so much to pee it is ridiculous! And of course once I get back in the bed I have to try to go back to sleep only for the whole process to repeat itself in an hour or two. My bladder feels like it is the size of a pea right now. haha

Best moment this week: watching him squirm around in my belly

Movement: his movements are slowing down but definitely becoming more pronounced. My belly always seems to have a lump somewhere on it

Food cravings: Still craving ice. I have been checked for anemia and don’t have it, but goodness I love me some ice! It is soooooo good!!! :-D

Gender: still a boy!!

Labor Signs: most definitely. Dilated to 1 cm now and having contractions all day long. They are nothing consistent at this point but I am even having them sitting down so things are definitely changing.

Belly Button in or out? Half in and half out. I only know this because I asked my hubby. At this point my belly is so low that sadly I can't see my belly button anymore. hahaha

Wedding rings on or off?  On!

What I miss: my bones not hurting. Holy moly does my pelvis hurt!!! My doctor said that Landon is definitely engaged in my pelvis so this is what is causing the majority of my pain. I have a definite waddle going on when I walk now.

What I am looking forward to: having this baby!!! 3 more weeks!!! Or less if he decides to come early.

Weekly Wisdom: rest as much as possible because once the nesting bug hits it is almost impossible to sit still! I was up till 2am last night cleaning my bedroom because it HAD to be done! lol

Milestones: getting this baby out! And getting his room finished. No his room still isn't done but we are getting there!! I hope it is done before he gets here but if it isn't that is okay too since he will be in our room for at least the first 8 weeks anyways.

Eventful Weekend

I will do my best to type here but part of my eventful weekend involves a busted finger so it is hard to type, so I may make some mistakes.

Friday: nothing to big happened. The hubby got off work that morning, took a nap and I hung out with my mom.

Saturday: The hubby and my dad worked on Landon's room. Yay!! So we are making some progress in there. After they were done we decided to hit the road and go to the Premium Outlets in Gaffney, SC. The ride up there was pretty good. We got some good deals and headed home. On the way home we stopped at McDonald's to pick up something to eat. After we got our food, I was trying to get Kameron her sandwich when I dumped all my fries on the floor!! Ugh!!! Shortly after that I tell Freddie that I have to pee and we begin the look for a rest area. Finally the rest area has arrived, at this point I'm about to bust and feeling kinda sick. We park, I slowly get out the car and close the door..........ON MY THUMB!!!!! OMG!!! The worst pain....I scream "OOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHH" and then burst into tears as I open the door to remove my thumb. My thumb has a huge dent in it and the nail is quickly turning colors. awesomeness. my finger throbs all the way home with occasionally sharp, shooting pains in it. When we get home Freddie tries to help me wrap it up so I don't bump it while I'm sleeping, I bump it in the process and end up throwing up from pain. my night is full of awesomeness at this point. Surely my weekend can't get any worse. hahaha

Sunday: wake up with throbbing finger which hinders everything I do. I feel yucky most of the day and even fall asleep on the sofa. I make it through most of the day and we finally get ready for bed about 10pm. As I laid down to go to sleep, I had the most severe pain I have ever had and it was on my c-section incision scar. I was in so much pain that I was crying, sweating, about to pass out and almost threw up. Freddie was scared, I was scared and the pain lasted for 15 minutes. After the pain quit my uterus stayed hard, would not let up and Landon stopped moving. We quickly got Kameron ready and dropped her off at my parent's house and went to the hospital. In the mean time I started having contractions every 3-5 minutes and they were lasting 45 seconds. Got to the hospital and the contractions were showing up on the monitor. They didn't think it was pre-term labor or anything, just irritability and they think my pain was round ligament pain. ooooooooooookkkkkkkkaaaaaaaaaay. Whatever....guess I'm an idiot but that was some scary stuff, the worst pain ever and did not feel like round ligament pain. So they gave me a liter of fluid....my contractions spaced out and they sent me home.

That concludes my weekend. As of today I'm still having random contractions and my thumb is worse. Kameron has bumped it twice and the finger is really swollen. So swollen that most of it is numb or tingly. Looks like I'm going to the doctor tomorrow about it. I sure hope I get some relief because this thing is killing me!!!

WE HAVE A DATE!!!

If little man cooperates and we make it; we will be meeting our son on April 9th! :-) My c-section is scheduled for 7:30am that morning. I really, really hope that he sticks to plan and the 9th will be his birthday, but I have come to understand that babies come whenever they are ready. If he wants to come earlier than he will. It is so much more real now that we are in fact having another baby and in 4 weeks he will be here. 4 weeks in general seems like such a short amount of time but it will probably drag by. :-( This week in fact has been super slow. Maybe because I was/am sick and the hubby was on night shift. I sure hope that is why because I might pull my hair out if every week from here on out is this slow! lol

Here is the latest bump picture that was actually taken at my shower last weekend. If I look tired in the picture it is because I was starting to get a sinus infection and didn't know it. :-/ A week later and it is still hanging out; everything takes longer to get over when you are pregnant.

Kameron insisted on being in the picture! And Landon is definitely making his presence known!

A year ago

Around this time in the morning, a year ago my whole world shattered with words I thought I would never hear. The words that my little baby's heart had quit beating. At that time I was so afraid that I would never be able to climb out of the darkness that I was immediately thrown into. I was hurt, scared and sad. I never knew losing my baby at just 10 weeks gestation would hurt so bad. There were days that the pain was immense and I felt like I was drowning it. I slowly began to heal and to climb out the darkness with help of my family and a wonderful lady that was going through the same pain I was. Slowly but surely I began to have a new "normal". My normal would never be what it was before, but I could deal with that. I would not let this ugly word miscarriage ruin me forever.

In the early days of my miscarriage I was not sure I would ever be willing to take the chance of trying to have another baby. I was so scared that this horrible thing would happen again. I knew I wanted another child, but was I willing to risk being in that kind of pain again? It was finally decided that we would try again. Full of fear but also trusting in God, we took that step to try to add to our family again. Two months later we got our positive pregnancy test. I was so excited and so scared all at the same time. I don't think a minute went by where I wasn't praying. Every appointment was nerve wracking, every scare throughout the pregnancy has been even more nerve wracking. But through all the complications my son has stayed with us. My son.....two words that have so much meaning. Two words that I thought I would never say. What a blessing he is to me even though he isn't here yet. He pokes me, he jabs me, he kicks me and he punches the heck out of my bladder. I can't believe that he will be here soon. He has brought so much healing to me in the short 30 weeks that I have known about him. The early weeks were very scary, the middle weeks had their scary times as well and even now we still have some scary times; but nonetheless he has brought healing. Healing and happiness to me and my family.

I still miss the baby that would have been a part of our family; the baby that would be 5 months old now. I still wish things would have been different, but I can't change what happened. I can only accept what has happened and move forward. I would say that in a year my life has made some drastic changes; changes that may not have happened if I had not lost my baby. Despite the pain I experienced, I am grateful for the 10 short weeks I had with my baby and for how losing he/she has shaped my life today. We never know why certain things happen and I still don't understand why I had to go through the loss that I went through. But I do know that through it all I have changed, I have grown, I have learned and I have healed.

I love you sweet baby. You will always be in my heart and in my thoughts.