In the darkness there is light

The darkness of the night has filled my living room with its inky blackness and all that fills the silence that the night brings is the sound of the chair creaking as I rock. Creak, creak, pop. Creak, creak, pop. I look down at what fills my arms as I rock; two little eyes stare back at me and I am lost. Lost in the eyes of innocence, lost in the eyes that I thought I would never see, lost in the eyes of my son. He stares at me and grips my shirt with his little hand. He starts to squirm and fuss so I begin to sing. I sing the song that I sang to him as he danced in my womb. As soon as I start singing he quiets back down "you are my sunshine, my only sunshine". He stares at my mouth as I sing, gripping tightly to my shirt. The third time through the chorus his eyes begin to slowly drift down in long blinks. Finally his eyes close, he snuggles in to my breast and sighs. As his breathing deepens tears fill my eyes. I want to sit like this forever in the darkness with the weight of my son in my arms. I know this can't last forever. Little pieces of my heart break with the knowledge that with each day that passes he is one day closer to growing up and not needing his mom. But for now, for now I cherish this time, the time to sit and rock, the time to watch him sleep, the time to watch him smile in his sleep. And as I cherish this time my heart is filled with a joy and a love that can not be explained.